


Sleeping Your Way to the Top | Mayhem

by engmaresh



Category: Allstate Insurance "Mayhem" Commercials, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Exhibitionism, Id Fic, Loki Does What He Wants, M/M, Rough Sex, Sakaar (Marvel), Size Kink, Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-16
Updated: 2018-01-16
Packaged: 2019-03-05 18:17:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13393512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/engmaresh/pseuds/engmaresh
Summary: I am the start of a string of overconfident decisions. Right now I'm your best bet to catching the Grandmaster's eye. And your best bet: sleeping with Mayhem like me.





	Sleeping Your Way to the Top | Mayhem

**Author's Note:**

> For those unfamiliar with the Allstate Mayhem commercials: [Mayhem like me](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnduNEc-Be4).

I am the start of a string of overconfident decisions. But right now, you're not worried. You believe you have given this a lot of thought.

You are on Sakaar. Galaxies away from Asgard, and all on your own. You’ve spent the last few days getting a feel of the place and you believe you’ve gotten to know it quite well already. The noise, the colours, the excesses, the fun, this is your kind of madness. But you’re not content to stay at the bottom of this mess. No, you’re going to climb your way to the top. Some way or another.

“Oh,” you say, when you see me. “You’ll do.”

I’ll do. You are drawn to me by my familiarity, and yet I stand out among all these colourful naked people. I appear Asgardian or human, and am dressed in three piece suit, grey, the kind you’d wear on a trip down to Midgard, though you’d probably trade the black tie for a green one. It’s a you thing. The tie makes a nice leash, and you slip it from my waistcoat and reel me in that way.

There’s a nice quiet corner in the crowded room. It’s the only nice quiet corner. It’s the only nice quiet corner for a reason, and you know that. Somehow nobody else seems as drawn to it as you are, all content to fuck in tangles of limbs in the center of the room. But you’ve always been drawn to the spotlight. This is all a part of your game.

I’m backed against the wall and I run my hands over your chest. There’s a lot of leather, belts, buckles, straps in the way, making it hard to get to your skin. That’s okay. I pull you closer for access to that low neckline, start sucking on your neck while I slide my hands down under the hem of your tunic and squeeze them down your pants. I grab your ass. I know you like that.

By the time I work my way to the front, you’ve made your tunic disappear, and I can see and access the ties on your pants. “Impatient,” you chuckle, and leave me to undo them while you lean back and snag a drink from a passing tray. It’s a very strong drink. You cough and I can feel your throat work under my lips as I brush them over your neck and down your chest. At this point, I have also managed to untie your pants and push them down your thighs. Meanwhile, I am still fully dressed, and you finally take enough notice to get started on removing the tie, after you’ve tossed your empty glass over your shoulder. It doesn’t break, but somebody stumbles over it.

I find that my tie and waistcoat don’t get the same treatment. They get trampled underfoot and kicked away, ready to trip someone. The shirt stays, but you rip that open. The buttons roll around on the ground. Accidents waiting to happen.

There is always convenient lubricant at an orgy and grab myself a handful of that, smoothing the way for my hand on your cock. You’re hard, and you can feel how hard I am too, in my pants and that’s making you excited. You finally get the zip down and pull my cock out.

“Huh,” you say, “That’s unexpected.”

I’m always am. Never mind the Midgard rumours of horse-cock, you haven’t had someone like me in a while. But as rash decisions go, this isn’t the worst you could make. You are after all at an orgy, and what’s the point of excess if you’re not indulging in it.

Now I’m the one getting impatient and since we seem to have decided how this will go, I take over. I trade places, and now you’re up against the wall, panting against the tacky gold wallpaper as I push my slick fingers into you. I manage to get two fingers into you at the first try, and though it makes you groan and dig your nails into the wall, you don’t tell me to stop. You’re going to completely embrace this decision and see it through till the end.

I grab more slick and add a third finger. You’re tight as hell, but you’re desperate for it, clenching around my fingers and pushing back for more. I’m beginning to feel eyes boring into the back of my head, drawn by your performance. You’ve been expecting them. 

At this point I’ve got four fingers in you, and you’re moaning like a cheap whore. Good. I think you’re ready for my cock. I slick myself up, push you against the wall with one arm, line myself up with the other. I press my head against your hole, and I start to feel the soft give until you gasp, “Wait, wait,” and you push me away so that you can turn around and put your back against the wall. One of your legs slides up around my hip, pulls me back in.

This way works too. You’re as heavy as you need to be, and I curve my hands under your ass and lift, brace you against the wall so that you can wrap both your legs around me. I can’t maneuver this way though, so I leave it to you reach between us and put my cock in you. I don’t bother to push in, just let gravity pull you down and split you open, and watch instead how your eyes glaze over and you bite your lip till it bleeds.

I don’t bother letting you adjust. The moment I’m balls deep in you I pull back. The tug makes you gasp and throw your head back. I can feel your nails dig into my shoulders as you try to hold back a groan. I know it’s too soon, too fast, but I fuck you through that initial burn anyway. Because that’s what I do. This is your stupid decision and I’m not here to stop you. You know things are going to get broken along the way to the top. One of these things might be you. Not that it matters, the way way you keeping insisting “ _ Move _ .”

I start fucking, and manage to find a steady pace, and despite the messy start you get used to it quickly enough.  _ Yes _ . I fuck you hard, as hard as you want it, and you don’t have to work too much for your performance. I feel your winded gasps blow across my shoulder every time I thrust forward. Your heels dig into my ass as you pull me close as you can, like you’re trying to claw your way under my skin. Clearly it’s been a while for you.

At some point you stop muttering “ _ harder _ ” and “ _ yes _ ”. I think he heard you. I think I’m also getting there, edging the point where  _ harder _ becomes the good part of  _ too hard _ for you. I’m a decision about to come into fruition. I’m also about to come. At this point I have you slumped against the wall, reduced to sobbing pants as I pound into you, and pinned like this you finally get what you want.

His hand moves around my waist but he somehow manages not to touch me. Instead his hand curls around your cock and like that you come, all over your own chest.

“Oh–  _ oh _ ,” he says, and leans over to rest his chin on my shoulder so he can watch. “That– isn’t that great.” Now I’m coming too.

It’s a good orgasm, a great one–you have a fantastic ass–but now that things are spiralling into motion, I know you want me to go away. I still pull out sooner than you expected, and you hiss at the sudden emptiness and the rush of come that follows. You slip a little on spilled lube and a stray button as you try to straighten. Oops. But he catches you and holds you upright.

“Hey,” he says, and you summon your sliest, most persuasive smile.

“Grandmaster.”

I slip away. Later you’ll find out you may have bitten off more than you can chew. Sleeping your way to the top isn’t as easy as you’d thought it’d be. And that’s before I throw your brother and his green friend into the mix. Until then, have fun sleeping with someone more unpredictable than mayhem like me.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> i was bored
> 
> also i haven't written smut in a loooong time and it probably shows


End file.
